How the Grinch Stole Las Vegas

every counter down in duesville liked vegas a lot.
but the grinch, who lived just west of duesville, did not.
he hated nevada, thought it not one bit pleasin';
i'm not really sure if he had a good reason

but hate it he did. he kept sending me work!
if i stayed one more week, i'd sure look like a jerk.
so i colored my chips amid pit bosses glarin',
said bye to the yoyo girls, and headed for mccarran

i flew back to the east, to my system what shock!
life in the real world -- i must really take stock:
no waitresses, cocktails, or poolside sun shining.
no double-downs, blackjacks, or comps for fine dining.
no pyramids, pirates, or volcanos blowing,
no girls with pants tight and their breasteses showing

the grinch never noticed the lack of these things
cause he hadn't yet seen the land of aces and kings
but he noticed my mood from the neon withdrawal,
and after some pondering, the grinch made the call

hook me up now, he said, audibling smirking
this project we're doing -- it's too much like working!
teach me to count and to size bets by the book
and to snow pesky critters, so i won't get the hook

well, they say the grinch was never the same since that day
when he decided to put his whole bankroll in play.
with KO or Hi-Opt, and aces on the side,
when the true gets to 4 he shouts: "let it all ride"